Why Go Public?


Many thoughts, prayers, and discussions went into the decision to go public with our story. We did not wake up one morning simply thinking it was a good idea. It was a long, thought out, and counseled process. Now, we may disagree with the fact that we went public because you may think that it’s a private matter. You are entitled to your opinion. The bottom line is that, in this case, there is no “right” or “wrong” idea and “good” or “bad decision; it is what we felt led to do.

Months after the beginning of our recovery process we started sharing our story with close friends and family. To our amazement, people were responding with so much grace and in return they trusted us with their personal stories. People started sharing their own struggles and unpacked their heavy loads of shame. And they weren’t just sexual brokenness stories. We received the honor to partner with people who needed to open up and had never found a safe place to do so. We began to see healing happening through the process of sharing with one and other.

The Bible says: ”Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed” (James 5:16). There is power in confession. There is healing in confession.

When I share my sin with another, the sin is brought to light and it loses its power. When I bring out that sin into the open, others realize that they are not the only one struggling with the same issue. The more I share, the less it has a grip on me.

Even psychologists will tell you that sharing your story may be the most powerful medicine on earth. Each time you share your story with another caring person, you switch off the body’s stress responses, flipping off toxic stress hormones like cortisol and epinephrine and flipping on relaxation responses that release healing hormones like oxytocin, dopamine, nitric oxide, and endorphins. Not only does this turn on the body’s innate self-repair mechanisms and function as preventative medicine—or treatment if you’re sick. It also relaxes your nervous system and helps heal your mind of depression, anxiety, fear, anger, and feelings of disconnection.

Isn’t it what the Bible says? That we have overcome by the blood of the lamb and the words of our testimony?

So, we share publicly because it is helping us heal and because it is healing others on the way! Share your story, be healed and heal others!